We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
