Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
