We need to rekindle our bromance
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We talked him into tasing himself.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
