Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
She told me I should be a condom model.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize