i just wanna soil my oats bro
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
