Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I think your dad took our porno
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
