with your own penis?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
