So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Randomize
