That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
