I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
