Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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