Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
