I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Randomize
