Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
