I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even know how to be here
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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