Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize