I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
this hospital has no fireball
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
