I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
