I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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