Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Randomize
