so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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