He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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