So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize