sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
