Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
