Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
