I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
