but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Randomize
