I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
