So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
porn star boner night. come get it.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
