In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize