I forgot how hot balto sounded
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
