A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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