We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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