so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
you never un-have a 4some
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize