Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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