i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
We just shotgunned beers for America
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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