I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Randomize
