Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'd cum for enchiladas.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
