Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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