i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
