This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
