Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
