is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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