It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
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