We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
