Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
