I don't think brook has ever known best
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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