What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
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i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
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I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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