Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
This toilet bowl is my home.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
