bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.