So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize